Interviewing TFP
by DuskMoon15
Summary: "Hey guys, Nikolai here. I know I haven't posted a new video for my blog in a while, but I have a really good reason. For the past week, I've been interviewing the cast of Transformers: Prime." The Autobots, Decepticons, and humans are treated to questions and comments from the fans as delivered by this author's OC. (Material needed.)
1. Introductions

**AN: I know what you all are thinking: "Why is she posting another multi-chapter fic when she already has so many in progress?" Three reasons: 1 - I had the idea for this story long before I ever came up with Rules to Keep You Alive or started working with bravekid on Prime: the Beast Saga. 2 - It's Summer Vacation, so I have the time to work on a lot of one-shots and stories. 3 - I'm going to say this up front: don't expect new chapters more than once every three weeks on this. I want to give as many people as possible a chance to submit questions and comments, so I won't be hasty in updating.**

See now, I am the man who yelled out from the crowd

For your blood to be spilled on this earth shaking ground

Yes then I turned away with a smile on my face

With this sin in my heart, tried to bury Your grace

And then alone in the night I still call out for You

So ashamed of my life, my life, my life

- Sidewalk Prophets, 'You Love Me Anyway'

**Disclaimer: I don't own Transformers.**

* * *

"Put down the camera and help me!" A teenager with chin-length brown hair set down what she was working on and faced her companion, putting her hands on her hips. "It wouldn't kill you to go two seconds without filming."

Unfazed by the girl's outburst, her blonde companion merely adjusted the focus on his videocamera. "A-"

"I told you, never use my real name while the camera's recording. Call me Dusk instead," the girl snapped. "Now help me, Nikolai!"

Nikolai moved the camera away from his eye and stuck his tongue out at her. "Then why do you get to use my real name?" he demanded.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Darkfeather, but I was under the impression that everyone who watches your blog already knows your real name." Dusk turned back to the item she had set down. It was a messenger bag filled to the brim with letters. "These need sorted before you leave. They should be categorized by faction, who they're addressed to, and the order in which we received them."

"Y'know, Darkfeather looses all respect when you say it like that," Nikolai whined, mounting his camera on its tripod nearby so he could continue filming while he helped sort the letters. "And yeah, they know my name, but do you have to go around announcing it?"

"You're eleven. I'm fifteen."

"Your argument is invalid."

They worked in silence for several minutes, occasionally checking each other's progress. Suddenly Nikolai turned to the camera with a sly grin. "Remember when I said that Dusk couldn't come with to do the interviews because she was too busy with stuff here?"

Dusk looked up, shooting him a stern glare. "You better not go there, Niko," she warned in a soft voice.

"That's not the real reason."

"Don't make me tell your mother about your blog!"

"She's actually grounded," Nikolai finished smugly. He crossed his arms and looked from the camera to his friend and back again. "Too much time on FanFiction and not enough on schoolwork, I believe her parents said."

"That's it; I'm calling your mother!" Dusk started to leave the room, but soon realized that if he got in trouble, she would have no one to conduct the interviews. She returned to sorting the letters.

"Ignore her," Nikolai said to the camera. "She's just mad she doesn't get to meet Knock Out and Ratchet."

"I can still hear you," Dusk said. She continued sorting while the eleven year-old next to her talked to his camera.

She tried to ignore his ramblings, but couldn't help but look at him when he remarked with a smug set to his face, "The best part about interviewing the Transformers: Prime cast? Dusk has to admit that Hetalia is better than Transformers in exchange for my help."

"In your dreams, Darkfeather," she growled, her gaze dropping back to the letters.

_"Please_ stop calling me Darkfeather if you're going to say it like that." Nikolai rolled his eyes as he spoke. He turned to his friend. "Admit is: Hetalia is better. And you like Lithuania more than Knock Out."

"Lithuania is cute," Dusk relented, and placed the last letter in its appropriate stack. "But Knock Out is fragging hot."

Nikolai rolled his eyes again, putting the now-organized letter stacks back into the messenger bag. "He's a robot."

"Lithuania is a nation."

"Knock Out acts like a prima donna."

"And Poland crossdresses." Dusk passed off the letter stacks as they were needed. "Your point?"

Nikolai took a breath to object, and then paused. "Touché." He looked over at the camera, whispering, "She'll say it when I get back." The name labeling the next stack of letters caused him to cast his friend a questioning glance. "These are addressed to me," he said, confusion drawing his brows together.

Dusk let out a soft, "No duh, Sherlock," sighing. She snatched the letters from him. "These were written by me for you. Since I can't go with you, this is the only way I can keep you safe." She looked directly at the camera, drew an arm around Nikolai's slim shoulders, and pulled him close, ruffling his short mohawk. "After all, we wouldn't want little Niko getting hurt when he's doing all these interviews for us, right?"

"Watch the hair," Nikolai complained.

Dusk hugged him tightly. "Be glad I actually care, you little brat. You know more than a few people who would throw you under the bus at their first chance."

"Okay, I see your point." Nikolai tried to push the older girl away, but she held firm. "You're crushing me; let go." Dusk lifted him off the ground and tightened her grip around his chest. "Please, Dusk, you're embarrassing me on camera," he begged.

"Then I'm doin' my job."

"But... shouldn't I leave for the interviews right away?"

Dusk frowned; Nikolai actually did have a point. Her grin faded angrily and she set him down. "Get going, then," she ordered.

Nikolai waved sharply. He removed his camera from the tripod and collapsed said tripod, tucking it under his arm. "See you in a few days."

Dusk waved back as he walked away. "Stay safe, Darkfeather."

* * *

Miles above the Earth, the warship known as the _Nemesis_ was full of Decepticons, each armed figuratively to the teeth. They were prepared for any eventuality. At least... they thought they were.

Of its own accord, the GroundBridge portal activated, causing the Decepticons in the immediate area to activate their weapons systems. A small figure - tiny by Cybertronian standards - strolled confidently into the warship.

The Vehicons exchanged looks. A human?

Said human was holding a thick stack of letters, one of which he was reading. Slung over his shoulder was a bag that held many more letters mixed in with a few notes and pictures. The human was of slight stature, with short blonde hair gelled up into a mohawk and blue eyes. He didn't bother to examine the titanic beings surrounding him. Suddenly he got to a certain part of the letter and dropped to the deck just as a plasma bolt exploded where his head had been moments before. "Okay, you called that one, Dusk," he said to nobody in particular. He got back to his feet.

One of the Vehicons was about to speak when the human held up one hand, not looking up from the letter.

"Yadda, yadda, yadda... Try to shoot you... Extremely hostile... Exercise caution... Ah, here we are." He tore his gaze from the paper and examined the Vehicon. "I have something important to discuss with," - he glanced down at the letter, an expression of disgust twisting his face - "Aw, do I really have to say that?!" He read the next line. "Fine, I'll say it. I have something important to discuss with Lord Megatron."

"Uh-"

The human cocked an eyebrow. _You guys are dumber than you look,_ his expression seemed to say. "It regards the Autobots and the Decepticon supporters on Earth."

The Vehicon made a gesture indicating the human should follow him and headed for the bridge. Once there, he made his presence known, hastily leaving.

"Name's Nikolai Androv," said the human as Megatron stared/glowered down at him. "Dusk sent me here to interview you and your crew."

Megatron straightened. "Why should I agree to this interview? And who is Dusk?" he demanded.

Nikolai remained uncowed. "Dusk isn't her real name; its just what she goes by online. She's a friend of mine who's kind of obsessed with you guys. Me? Couldn't care less. In fact, I don't even like you guys or your show. The only reason I'm here is because Dusk made me an offer I can't refuse." He examined his stack of letters, selecting one near the top. He opened it and skimmed the text. A chuckle escaped him. "Dusk says, 'Do the interview because you have hundreds upon hundreds of fans who are willing to obey your commands.'"

"Yes, but _why?"_ Megatron contemplated blasting the human.

"Ooh, what have we here?" Nikolai removed several photographs from the envelope. He examined them, his earlier smug grin deepening into a smirk. "Take a look, bucket-head." He turned them so Megatron had a good view. The Decepticon leader shifted uncomfortably, leaning down. Nikolai analyzed his reaction to the photos. "Do the interview or these go all over the internet."

Megatron growled and aimed his fusion cannon at the human.

Nikolai shrugged. "Dusk's words, not mine," he said. Stuffing the photos in his jeans pocket, he reread the letter in his hand. "She also says she has extra copies at her house, so even if you destroy these ones, they'll still go all over the internet if you don't agree to letting me interview you and your crew."

"Soundwave," Megatron ordered. The one word was enough. Soundwave set to work on the main console searching for the location of the human Nikolai referred to as 'Dusk.'

"See, this is why she uses a pseudonym online. You won't even find her FanFiction account if you're just looking up the name I told you." Nikolai shrugged the bag off his shoulder and took out some of the notes and letters. "So, Megzy - can I call you Megzy? Everyone does - you gonna do the interview? If not, I'll just leave and go to the Autobots and your reputation will go kaput."

Megatron vented heavily as Soundwave finally gave up searching for Dusk and turned expectantly towards him. "What questions do you have for me?"

A grin formed on Nikolai's lips. He patted his messenger bag. "Too many to list at this exact moment. Let me set up my camera and we'll get started."

* * *

**AN: So, here's the introduction to the interviews. Megzy's up first, so I need material for him - comments, questions, that sort of thing.**

**One thing I have to ask, though: these interviews are rated T, no higher, and while I respect you all have your own pairings that you love and support, I personally support none and would greatly appreciate it if you refrain from asking questions relating to pairings, not only for my own comfort but to avoid putting off other readers.**


	2. Interviewing Megatron

Lord, let Your sleeping giant rise

Catch the demons by surprise

Holy nation sanctified

Let this be our battle cry

- Casting Crowns, 'Until the Whole World Hears'

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers: Prime, or any other aspect of the Transformers franchises.**

* * *

After allowing one of the Vehicons to pick him up and place him on the main console, Nikolai set up his tripod and camera and turned the camera on. He dug out a stack of letters. Turning to the camera, he said pleasantly, "Hey there, people of the internet! Remember way back when Dusk hijacked my blog and promised you guys an interview with the cast of Transformers: Prime? Well, guess where I am now?" He gestured around him at the Bridge. "That's right: I'm on the _Nemesis._ I still don't like Transformers, but even I have to admit this is pretty cool." A reluctant note of gratitude crept into his voice, and he made a mental note to thank his friend later. "First up on my list of - um, what's that word Dusk uses? Bot? No, no, that's not it. Oh, I got it! - mechs to interview is," - he cringed as though saying the title physically hurt, - "Lord Megatron." He stepped a bit to the side, revealing the Decepticon leader's intimidating form to the camera.

Megatron cycled his vents. He wasn't thrilled with the idea of answering questions, be they from his so-called 'fans' or not. The only reason he agreed was because the human called Dusk that Nikolai always referred to had somehow obtained a copy of a very... _compromising_ photo.

"And Sonic Prime, your letter was first submitted, so it's going to be the one I read first," Nikolai announced, waving an envelope in front of the lens. The contrast between his attitude when he first arrived and when the video camera began recording was striking. "Okay, here goes nothing. 'One: would he kill or keep Jack, like a pet or slave - whichever you prefer - if he ever got the chance?'" He flashed a mock expression of pity. "I must say, I'm glad I'm not Jack in this situation."

Megatron had already conceded to the fact that he had no choice about answering the humans' questions, but he wasn't quite ready to give the smug brat the satisfaction of knowing. "Given no other choice, I suppose I could find _some_ amusement in keeping the human as a pet," he replied eventually, rolling his optics in exasperation.

Nikolai shot him a look that read, _Really, you're gonna act that way?_ Regardless, he continued with the letter. "'Two: Why hasn't he ever promoted Soundwave to be his second in command or the like?"

"Ah, there is a very good reason for that." Megatron shifted a little bit closer to the camera so as to seem more intimidating. "While Soundwave is indeed more competent than Starscream overall, there is one area in which he is sorely lacking. Soundwave does not possess the moronic, undying drive that Starscream does despite his repeated failures."

"That made absolutely no sense, but whatever floats your boat!"

"The _Nemesis_ is not a boat," Megatron corrected.

Nikolai tilted his head slightly to one side, an eyebrow cocked and a smirk on his lips. "It's a warship, isn't it?" he asked. Megatron gave a reluctant confirmation, and the human went on. "A Warship is a type of ship. Ship is synonymous with boat. Ergo, the _Nemesis_ is a boat."

It took all of Megatron's willpower not to incinerate him then and there.

A snicker escaped Nikolai at this. He looked back down at the letter, his teeth showing in a bemused grin. "'And three: what is the funniest thing he has ever seen in his life?'" he read. His grin stretched wider. "This should be interesting."

This time, it was Megatron who let out a snicker. He leaned away from the camera, looking upwards as he searched his memory. After a while, he said simply, "I wouldn't want to give you the luxury of knowing, but rest assured it involves Starscream."

Nikolai glanced around to make sure there were still other Decepticons in the Bridge. To his delight, there was a plethora of Vehicons along with Soundwave. He stepped into the camera's view, half facing it. "Show of hands: who's surprised it involves Starscream?" he called.

Around the entire Bridge, not a servo went up.

Stepping back out of the shot, Nikolai returned the letter to his messenger bag and moved on to the next envelope. Suddenly he rummaged in the bag for the stack of envelopes he had when he first arrived. An expression of extreme concentration crossed his face. When he found the one he wanted, he opened it and turned to the camera. "Dusk wants me to tell you that whatever I say about the second question of the next letter has nothing to do with what she said in regards to the event- Hey!" He glared at the camera. "I thought your letters were supposed to _help_ me, not call me an idiot! Ah, forget it. I'll get you back when I get home." He threw down Dusk's letter and opened the other envelope. "Next is Sophia901, whose first question is: 'Megatron, how old would you be in human years?'"

"There is not a measure of time accurate enough to convey my approximate 'age,' but it is well over a few hundred millennia," Megatron replied, his tone more relaxed now.

Nikolai decided not to comment, instead moving on. "'Why did you use Dark Energon?'"

The touch of madness present in the back of Megatron's crimson optics seemed to take over. "The blood of Unicron allows one to become faster, stronger. It increased my power a hundred-fold!" he bellowed.

Nikolai shrank away at the sheer volume of the Decepticon's answer. He quickly interrupted to prevent Megatron from giving him further hearing damage. "Moral of the story: drugs are bad for you. They might turn you into _that."_ He jerked his thumb in Megatron's direction, not even bothering to be discreet. "Now, third question: 'What do you think of Jack, Miko, and Raf?'"

"They are nuisances, but once in a while they err in my favor."

"Last question: 'What is your alt-mode?'"

"A Cybertronian jet, of course," Megatron replied, standing straighter.

"That explains why it looks so funny," Nikolai muttered.

Megatron turned a withering glare on the human. "You are trying my patience."

The grin Nikolai gave him was all teeth. "I know. Moving on, next we have a short letter from Soniccouples10." Along with the letter, he pulled out a few sheets of paper and held them out to Megatron. "Read this before I read the letter."

Megatron accepted the papers and scanned them in a matter of seconds. He was about to remark on them when the human continued.

"Their letter is as follows: 'I have a question for Megatron: Why did you go from a Miner to a kickaft Gladiator? And then to a kickaft warlord? And also I want your opinion of a story in my gallery called "It Started With a Promise." I just want to see your reaction to it.'"

Megatron sighed. "I became what I had to in order to end the High Council's reign of tyranny on Cybertron."

"Hypocrite," Nikolai coughed.

"In regards to the story, as inaccurate as it was, it was not all that bad," Megatron continued. "I have seen worse interpretations as to how Starscream became my First Lieutenant."

Nikolai merely shrugged and opened the next envelope. "These next few questions are from Tinyterror. First: 'What was your relationship to Optimus Prime back on Cybertron when you two were Orion Pax and Megatronus? Were you two brothers or something more?'" he read.

Megatron shifted his weight from one pede to the other, looking more than slightly uncomfortable. "It would not be entirely accurate to describe our relationship as one between brothers," he said uneasily, his optics trained on something only he could see. "It would be better to describe it as one between colleagues of equal standing. He and I had the same vision, until he stepped out of line during our hearing with the High Council."

Sensing the awkwardness of the situation, Nikolai wisely chose to keep his mouth shut on the matter. "'Next question: What do you think of the Autobot scout Bumblebee? No lying, now.'" The human rolled his eyes and said dramatically, "Oh, a Decepticon would _never_ lie." He looked at the bottom of the letter, his face turning red. "Sorry, Tinyterror, but I'm _not_ reading that last sentence. Sue me."

Clearly glad the subject had been changed, Megatron returned to his earlier demeanor. "He is strong-willed, I suppose. Still, he is an enemy to be defeated and I have no other opinion of him."

"I'm glad," Nikolai commented. "And I hope you're not lying."

"Get on with it," Megatron ordered.

Nikolai stuck out his tongue. "When I want to," he snapped, the teasing note in his voice reminding the Decepticon leader of a spolied sparkling. Megatron growled, and Nikolai took a step back, putting his hands in the air. He picked up another envelope and ripped it open. "Alright, I'm continuing. Up next is... um, WingedWolfAlari, who has quite a few questions for you. They start with: 'Are those pointy shoulder things or your giant plasma cannon over-'" He broke off and giggled, burying his face in his palm. "'Overcomp-'" He couldn't finish, chuckling uncomfortably. "'Overcompen-'" Finally, he recovered his composure and tried again. "'Are those pointy shoulder things or your giant plasma cannon overcompensating for something?'"

Megatron leaned down to make eye contact with Nikolai. "Exactly what are you suggesting, fleshling?" he demanded.

"WingedWolfAlari's question, not mine," Nikolai insisted, taking a nervous step back. "Let's move on, shall we? Next question: 'What was your toughest gladiatorial battle back when you were Megatronus?'"

This served to make Megatron's anger dissipate. He moved away from the young human, pondering the question for some time before replying, "Hmm... it would have to be the time I was faced with nine or ten combiners at once." He smirked in satisfaction as he recalled the battle. They still weren't much of a challenge, though," he added.

"'Do you miss the good times you once had with Orion Pax on Cybertron before the war?'" Nikolai read.

"No," Megatron snapped, just a bit too quickly.

"Whatever you say," Nikolai said in a sing-song voice. "Third question: 'If you were a Predacon, what would be your name and what kind of beast would you turn into?'"

"What makes you think I would bear a different name, regardless of what form I have? As for what kind of beast, I rather like the dragon-esque frame of Predaking."

"Preda-who-now?" Nikolai asked. He hadn't been keeping up with Transformers: Prime since the Second Season Finale. Even though he didn't like the show, he still watched it to make Dusk happy.

Yeah, Dusk really should have brought him up to speed before sending him alone on the interviews.

"None of your concern," Megatron growled.

"Whatever. 'Does the fact that Bulkhead's human killed Hardshell and beat up Starscream along with two other Vehicons change your view on humans in general?'"

"I learned from that... _experience..._ not to underestimate what humans are capable of any longer. There. Are you happy?" Megatron snarled, his shark-like denta exposed.

"Quite," Nikolai replied, though of course he knew the question wasn't aimed at him. "Now: 'How many times has Starscream tried to overthrow you?'"

"Soundwave?" Megatron called, deferring to his communications officer.

Soundwave typed at a nearby console for a few seconds. Eventually, a line of Cybertronian text appeared on-screen. "Records indicate a total of 1,986 attempts by Starscream at usurping Lord Megatron," announced an automated voice.

"You know, based on what Dusk has told me about Starscream, that's a lot less than I expected," Nikolai remarked.

"That number is from when we stopped counting," Megatron said.

"And when did you stop counting?"

"Before we left Cybertron."

"And WingedWolfAlari's final question: 'Is it true that you only keep Starscream around because he makes great cookies?'" Nikolai fought to keep his expression neutral. He really did. Unfortunately, he never could quite master the art of the Poker Face.

Megatron, however, was considerably less amused. "What, pray tell, is a cookie?"

Nikolai turned to the camera. "There's your answer."

Megatron put his digits to his forehead. Answering all of these humans' moronic letters was becoming taxing. "How many more questions are there?" he asked.

"There are six more-"

"Oh, thank Primus."

"- _letters_ left," Nikolai finished, trying to sound apologetic. "I don't know exactly how many _questions,_ sorry." He bent down to replace the finished letter. "This one is from Prodigal the Son." He cleared his throat, pulling on the collar of his shirt. "'Megatron, I'm a huge fan of you for many reasons. You are fearless in the face of your enemies, and more determined than most. I find the fact that you were a gladiator AND a politician incredibly awesome! If I had to - and don't take this the wrong way - I'd say you are like Spartacus crossed with Adolf Hitler. In a cool way.

"'I have a question for you, if it is not against your wishes? Do you expect yourself to stay leader forever? I was simply wondering if Cybertronians age, I mean, if it then you could potentially be a king for all eternity! Doesn't that elate you?

"'Please pass this on to Megatron, Nikolai!'" He stepped into view of the camera yet again, facing it. "Before I let Bucket-head here answer, Prodigal, I have to say something in regards to the second part of your letter. Which I'm saving for Starscream's interview. I don't like being called Nik, but you can call me Niko. Or Darkfeather, as long as you don't say it like Dusk does," he said. The final part of the last sentence was said in a dark mumble. Moving out of the shot, he turned back to Megatron, his smile once again all teeth. "Floor's all yours, Megzy."

Choosing to ignore the provcation, Megatron replied, "Ah, if only all humans were like you. Perhaps then I would consider keeping a few around. I am greatly pleased that you think appropriately highly of me. As for the references to the humans-"

"In case you didn't know, Megatron, Adolf Hitler was the leader of Germany in WWII," Nikolai interrupted. "Real bad dude. Had a few screws loose, if you know what I mean-"

"I am not above injuring you, human," Megatron threatened.

"Hurt me, and Dusk will post the photo on every social networking site in existence," Nikolai growled, ensuring that he made eye contact with the towering Decepticon leader. "I don't doubt Soundwave would eventually take it down, but by that time, the point would be moot. Enough people would have seen it."

It would be so easy to crush the boy right now and be done with him. _So easy._ Regardless, Megatron restrained himself. "As I was saying, in regards to the humans you referenced, I am unsure whether to take offense or not. To answer your question, yes, we Cybertronians do age, but very slowly in comparison to you humans. Millennia pass for us much the same as a single year would for your kind."

Remaining silent, Nikolai moved on to the next letter. After just a quick skim of the text, he was on the verge of a mad fit of giggles. He looked absolutely thrilled at the letter he had just opened. "From Not-To-Fit-In," - he barely managed to get the words out, - "'Megzy, is it true that the war was started because you are just a stubborn sparkling?'" Having read the question aloud, Nikolai gave in and nearly collapsed in a laughing fit.

"I am not a 'stubborn sparkling,' as you so rudely put it, ignorant fleshling," Megatron snarled. "I was a gladiator in the Pits of Kaon. A sparkling, no matter how stubborn, would never have lasted a nanoklik."

"Ooh, someone hit a nerve!" Nikolai exclaimed delightedly, his laughter ceasing. "'Is it true that you have a secret obsession over Arcee?'"

Completely straight-faced, Megatron replied in an even voice, "I have no such obsession over the Autobot femme."

"Er..." Nikolai swallowed hard before reading the next question. "'Did you know you're not ruler of Cybertron? At all?'"

Megatron shot him a glare that could have felled an elephant.

Nikolai's hands flew up, and he backed as far away from the titanic Decepticon leader as he could. "Hey, don't shoot the messenger!" he yelled, blue eyes wide.

Without missing a beat, Megatron turned smoothly so that he faced the camera dead-on. "Did you know that you are extremely fragile and able to be squished under my pede?" he asked, his denta showing in a deadly smile. "Very easily?"

"Well, that escalated quickly," Nikolai squeaked, his voice still high-pitched and shaking. "Moving on: 'Is it true you dance to_ Girls Just Wanna Have Fun?'"_

"No," Megatron answered, yet again just a little too quickly.

Nikolai suddenly regained his boldness. He slipped in front of the camera, declaring loudly, "I think he's hiding something. How about you guys?" He grinned.

Megatron vented, reminding the human that there were still more letters.

"Okay, next letter." Nikolai caught the hint. He opened another envelope. "'Megatron,

"'I have a lot of things I would like to say to you but I shall try to keep it as short as possible. You are the leader of the Decepticons and I am sure your time is valuable. I deeply admire the fact that you wished for a free Cybertron filled with prosperity and equality for all castes, including the lower ones who were abused so the higher castes could live in luxury. In that aspect, I respect you.

"'In other aspects however, I do not. Your intentions may have been noble in the beginning but as the old saying goes, "The path to hell is paved with good intentions." You have turned into a cold, ruthless mech who is willing to crush anyone in his way (even members of his own faction) just so he can get what he wants. When did your spark turn so cold to feelings such as mercy, compassion, and empathy? If you continue to go down this path, there is only more death and suffering... There will never be victory for you. Will you be satisfied once Earth is destroyed just like Cybertron? Will that fill the void? Greed and power can only satisfy one for so long... but they are fickle mistresses. They will turn on you and leave you empty.

"'I deeply hope that you refrain from going down this dark path soon for I believe that every mech and femme has the capacity for change, even you. May Primus be with you, Megatron.

"'Also, if I have not aggravated you too deeply, I have a few questions to ask you.

"'Why did you offline Dreadwing, one of your most loyal soldiers and one time First Lieutenant? And protecting Starscream no less. I have no qualms towards the mech but... truly? Dreadwing has shown more loyalty towards the Decepticon cause than Starscream ever did.

"'Secondly, on that note, what made you choose Starscream as your Second-in-Command?

"'Lastly, what could have ever possessed you to rip out Bumblebee's voice box? I realize that the young scout refused to give you your desired information about the Autobots but... it was a cruel act nonetheless.

"'Well, that is all I can think of at the moment. Good day, Megatron. I sincerely hope and pray for the best for you.

"'Sincerely,

"'Dream'sRealm.'" Nikolai panted. He had stopped for breath several times in reading, and now he leaned his hands on his knees, chest heaving. "Would... make a quip... but- Can't... breathe." His legs buckled, leaving him sprawled on his back on the main console. *

"What a remarkably intelligent argument," Megatron mused, nodding to himself. "Coming from a human, that is. While you said that you respect me, and the reasons you offered are indeed to be admired, you immediately turned around and stated why you _don't."_ He nonchalantly prodded the still-collapsed Nikolai with a digit before continuing. "I do what is necessary to ensure victory. _My_ victory. If that means destroying any and all who stand in my way, so be it." He chuckled menacingly. "And simple fleshling, I will not destroy Earth. I will conquer it and Cybertron, because to rule one and not the other is to rule neither. Your concern is touching, but ultimitely futile. My future is set in stone. I _will_ rule both worlds. Nothing can prevent that, not even Optimus Prime.

"I will humor you and answer your questions, however," he said, prodding Nikolai again, who reluctantly got back to his feet while muttering something about Dusk. "The problem with Dreadwing was that he was only one half of a whole spark. No matter how devoted he was to me, he would always be more devoted to Skyquake in the end. Starscream will always remain loyal to the Decepticon cause as long as it benefits him, and now, any other path would mean death for him.

"I selected Starscream as my Second-in-Command because, for all his faults, he actually is very competent. Choosing him was also the only way to ensure the loyalty of the Seekers." Megatron appeared contemplative as he answered.

"As for your last question," he began, recalling the memory in an almost fond manner. "The scout unwisely chose not only to refuse me the information I desired, but to mock me while doing so." He gave a smile that Nikolai would later describe as a cross between Slasher and the Joker. "Naturally, he paid with his voice."

Nikolai had already opened another letter. "This one is really short; just one question from DJ R3M1X: 'Are you obsessed with the internet, especially Youtube?'"

"No."

"Alright, then." Nikolai moved on to the next letter and ripped the envelope open. "'Hmmm...

"'Have you ever been given any sort of nickname based off your name (besides Megatron, I mean)?

"'I noticed that, in certain "historical documents," it states that you and Soundwave fought in the gladiator pits to first wound. Is that how he lost his face and voice?

"'Why do you let Starscream have so much freedom? I mean, sure, he can be helpful sometimes, but I doubt I'd let him go anywhere without a guard of loyal Vehicons watching the backstabber's every move.

"'Before I go, consider this: if you had listened to Orion Pax's more peaceful, diplomatic suggestions, you might have been able to avoid the entire war and get rid of the castes at the same time! However, I'm not sure how that would have changed things as to who the next Prime would have been...

"'An outside observer,

"'Nexus, aka FourthWallBreaker.'"

Megatron considered the letter carefully, crafting a reply. Eventually, he said, "I have been given 'nicknames,' though mostly by the Autobots. Mega-head and Megzy are the most common. Personally, I detest all of them." Glancing back at Soundwave, he continued, "Soundwave has lost neither his face nor his voice. He has had alterations made to his frame and internal systems in order for him to perform his job as Chief Communications Officer to the best of his ability.

"As for the question about Starscream, rest assured: he has much less freedom than you think. Soundwave spies on more than just the Autobots, you know."

"So does he spy on you?" Nikolai interrupted cheekily, grinning from ear to ear.

"My patience for you wears thinner by the moment, human," Megatron cautioned.

"I know," Nikolai replied, waving off the thinly veiled threat. "Continue."

"As for your last comment, human, I am going to pretend that you did not say any of that, else I be forced to kill you."

"You're just saying that because you know they're right."

"Get on with it," Megatron commanded.

Nikolai rolled his eyes, but complied. He opened the final envelope with a dramatic flourish, which he seemed to forget would not be captured by the camera because he was standing out of its view. "'From moyashi,'" he read. "'I gotta ask, why do you keep putting Starscream in a position of power, knowing the number of times he's burned you? And why did you offline Dreadwing in Screamer's stead? You said yourself loyalty like Dreadwing's is rare, as opposed to Starscream's lack thereof.

"'Also, is it true you're a Brony? Even though your show is getting shut down for MLP?'"

"For the last time, Starscream is more competent and useful than you humans seem to think," Megatron snapped. "As for your question regarding Dreadwing, I believe I answered that for..." He trailed off, unable to remember the name.

"Dream'sRealm," Nikolai prompted.

"Them," Megatron said. "And what in Primus' name is a Brony?"

Nikolai sighed, bringing a hand up to his forehead. "Dude, that would take forever to explain, but luckily, you still kind of answered the question." He stepped in front of the camera. "There you have it, ladies and gentlemen: Megatron's interview!" He turned off the camera.

"Are we done?" Megatron demanded.

_"We're_ done," Nikolai confirmed, turning back to face the Decepticon leader, "but I still have to interview your officers."

"That wasn't part of the deal."

"No, that _was_ the deal." Nikolai crossed his arms. "I interview you and your officers, and Dusk doesn't post the photo online. Of course... if you've changed your mind..."

"No, no!" Megatron interrupted. "Who are you going to interview next?"

Nikolai grinned, and pulled out a new set of letters. "Excellent. I need Starscream."

* * *

**AN: Niko's having too much fun tormenting Megatron to thank anyone, so I will. Thanks to Sonic Prime, Sophia901, ****Soniccouples10, Tinyterror, WingedWolfAlari, Prodigal the Son, Not-To-Fit-In, Dream'sRealm, ****DJ R3M1X****, FourthWallBreaker/Nexus, and blondie-moyashi for sending in letters. **

*** Dream'sRealm, your letter wasn't too long at all (I rather enjoyed the length, actually) but Nikolai likes to be overdramatic and pretended it was.**

**Next up is Starscream, so I need material for him - questions and comments, you know the drill.**

**My request from last chapter still stands. Please refrain from asking questions related to pairings/shippings in order to avoid making this uncomfortable for me to write, and more importantly, to avoid putting off other readers.**

**... Also, would you mind telling me how I did this chapter? I can't really tell if Megatron's quite right. And if Nikolai's too annoying, let me know because I can fix that.**


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